I am not breaking up with you. I am simply letting you know that what we have is dead.
These were the words I spoke to Daniel (just months before I asked him to marry me) in 2011.
Moments before that, I had given him an honest “play-by-play” account of how I had almost physically cheated and definitely emotionally cheated on him—- with someone of whom I felt was more “enlightened” and “conscious” than he was.
Full disclosure—-when I think back to this moment, I cringe just a little bit. With this sweet embarrassment, I feel an interesting mix of gratitude, and humor, sprinkled with bits of admiration and toped with just a bit of horror. I’ll even roll my eyes just a little bit at myself.
Yes, I was self-absorbed.
Yes, I did not sugarcoat anything.
Yes, maybe felt just a little bit of shame for my actions, but I was at a turning point.
I had just awakened to the power of my inner Love Renegade. I felt my love renegade brewing inside of my heart. She was immature and rough-around-the-edges, but she was beautifully raw, passionate, vulnerable, and unapologetic.
When I reflect on this both very inspiring and very awkward and almost cringe-worthy moment, I admire how bold, courageous, and unattached I was. I took a huge risk. I was willing to let go of a relationship where I felt like my true nature was not allowed. I was willing to burn it all down in the name of fierce unapologetic truth.
Have you gone through a moment like this?
Have you ever been so authentic and unrehearsed?
Have you had the courage to tell someone your flaws and to accept whatever reaction they had to it?
On the other side…
…Are you holding back on sharing yourself?
…Are you choosing to edit yourself and repress your desires?
The path of the Love Renegade is not an easy one. It is unconventional. Most people will be triggered by someone who “gets away” with breaking social paradigms.
And it makes sense.
When we go through years of living our life one way and then one day we just decide to change, it is inevitable that our environment—which includes our relationships—is going to react.
That’s universal law. 🙂
The choice to tap into your Love Renegade is rooted in love. It’s a path that gives you permission to disconnect from the “noise”—all of the “have-tos,” the social obligations, the “shoulds, etc” and instead, tune into the voice of your inner wisdom while living life according to your own principles and boundaries.
Are you brave enough to have the life and relationship that you dream about?
Many judge this the Love Renegade path as being selfish and rude. As love renegades, we compassionately welcome and embrace the difference of opinion. Healing is the most high vibe form of rebellion. Every rebel needs an opposition. It is this polarity of reaction to your choice to heal that shows fuels your inner love revolution and empowers you to break the laws of love™.
The “laws of love” are NOT standards to follow, adhere, and aspire towards. They are the opposition, the very social paradigms, needless “rules,” and fear-based structures that are designed by the collective to put you in your place and to keep you from thinking freely and acting honesty. These laws of love ensure that your relationships are stifling and that you do not live out your purpose.
As Love Renegades, we make it a our soul’s journey in pursuit of the relationships that most reflect our highest potential back to us to “break the laws of love™.”
This path is not always pretty. Sometimes, it can be downright messy. This is because the process of healing does not unfold occur in a perfect straight line. There are lots of magical squiggles and plot twists. There is a bit of drama and speaking archetypically, there are hero moments of pure love and self-actualization too.
In 2011, I broke the laws of love™ when I spoke my very revealing and messy (and almost-shameful) truth to Daniel. I did not let my “bad behavior” keep me hostage. I realized I had broken agreements in our relationship and I was gaining clarity on why I chose to do to make those choices. With the light that I found, I knew things would not be the same ever again.
Daniel broke the laws of love™ when he chose to meet me on my journey by healing and growing with me. Daniel and I have been together 10 years. I often say that our relationship is one of my greatest achievements. Each day I am moved by the unconditional love we share and the absolute honesty that we practice.
(In case you might be thinking that Daniel must have been weak and that his choice not to leave the relationship was a decision that a doormat would make, nothing could be further from the truth. Daniel is and has always been one of the most powerful, secure, and self-confident people that I know. Even though he did not like the information I brought forth to him, he was trusted that this challenge was more than just a blow to the ego and that he had manifested an opportunity for healing, growth, and empowerment. He chose to step into this opportunity, with his love renegade in tow.)
Are you interested in breaking the laws of love™? Do you want to meet your inner love renegade? Apply for a Heart Connection Session, a judgement-free Love Renegade coaching session, where you will:
- Dive deep into the desire of your heart
- Receive truthful insight
- Find out what’s next