We are Complete

We are Complete

Do you judge others for not giving you the support (ahem, validation) that you would like?  Does a part of you feel that you *need* support from others to be the person you desire to be?

I ask these questions to shed light on Mistaken Thinking where love and support are confused with entitlement and validation.  See, it is normal to seek safety and comfort when you are making changes and making new choices.

What we forget in this process is the Illusion of Drama, the Illusion of Relationship™ that separates us from Love by insisting that drama come with the natural chaos of change.   

When we make changes our environment will react.  By environment I am largely referring to our relationships.  The other person (let’s say your partner, your husband, your adult child, your best friend, etc)  may not be in “like vibration” to the changes you are making and may react as such.  In this instance, it is important that you acknowledge that like you, this person has free will.

Just as you are free to make changes, others are free to react to those changes.  If any part of you is seeking validation and approval and even feels entitled to receiving this so-called unconditional support, all you are really doing is activating the Illusion of Drama by causing yourself unnecessary drama, pain, and agony. 

I bring this up to invite you to acknowledge your own actions, your own intentions, and your own process of initiating change. For example, have you entered into change with a variation of either of the following?  (I have done both!) 

Example A–  You bulldoze forward with an attitude of, “I don’t care what others think! They will have to deal with it!”
Example B– You take action, but you do it in a covert way. It’s like you are living a double life.

Each of the aforementioned situations will inevitably lead to fear because they were initiated with fear.  Not only do both of these actions invite drama, as they amplify the Illusion of Drama, but they also make assumptions, which is a hallmark of the Illusion of Absorption. 

As you grow, it is wise to accept that much like your inner world and our beautiful oceans, your relationships will ebb and flow.  You may find that some of these relationships fall away.  This can be both a time of grief and a time of celebration.

Whether your heart is hurting from a breakup or a series of misunderstandings, choose to know that healing and peace are on the way.  What would happen if you stepped out of a victim mentality and into your own authority?  What would you do differently with all that you learned?  What has the other person taught you about yourself? 

Bless the gifts of these experiences and move on.

We are complete. We are whole. All is well.

No Permission Needed

It is Mistaken Thinking to believe that you need permission from some outside authority to have what you desire. You may wonder, “who is this perceived outside authority?”  Before we go into the answer to that question, let’s talk about change. Please consider the following questions and select at least one to reflect upon:

  • What in your relationship and life would you love to see “magically” change?
  • What would the tone of your relationship or dating experience transform into?
  • How would your qualities of friendships shift?
  • What would you no longer tolerate in your life and relationships?

In order for any of your answers to the above to occur, you must be willing to make the change that is reflected in the answer to the question. Here are some examples:

  • Example One– You want your partner to be fully supportive of your growth and your path. If this is true and you want to be able to connect with them on a deeper level, then you be the one to give yourself the permission, love, attention, and support that you desire from your partner.
  • Example Two- Perhaps you are tired of playing the role of the “helpful friend” who always gives free advice. If this is the case, then consider that maybe you choose to be the “helpful friend” to obtain permission (a.k.a. validation) instead of stepping into higher levels of your self-worth.
  • Example Three- Maybe it is time to set a boundary or start a new endeavor that you have been thinking about for some time, but instead of moving forward, you fear the fallout.  Instead of taking action, you allow confusion and the fixation of what other people will think (i.e. secretly wondering if you have their permission) to keep you from moving forward.

What it comes down to is this…

Because you are the most important person in your life, you are the best authority in your life too! Will you give yourself permission to create a life that you love? 

Thank you for reading and for spending time with yourself today.

Sending you blessings.  <3

With Love and Wisdom,

Lauren

The Powerful Thing about Breakups

I woke up at 4:30 AM with the powerful thing about breakups resonating throughout my being. Instead of going back to sleep I found myself out of bed and on my mediation cushion ready to start the day.

Whether it is a relationship ending or a time in your life changing, many of us have a hard time letting go and moving on. We can internalize the pain. We play out the scenarios and what-if situations over and over again.

How would you feel if you were Person A in this scenario?

Person A: My heart is broken! This relationship is ending!

Person B: Congratulations!!  It looks like new changes are unfolding in your life!

Would you find Person B to be really insensitive?

Years ago I hosted an event called “Soul-level Healing for Your Broken Heart.”  What I came to see is that the people who attended had different expectations of healing. Instead of wanting to see a higher purpose and meaning and tap into their power, the group had a genuine desire to bask in their heartbreak and be seen for the tragedy they had just endured.

My 2016 self was a little bewildered.  But I get it. I really do.  Loss of any kind comes with a grieving process that has its own timeline.  We all want to be listened to and heard.  This is a beautiful and necessary part of healing.  We need to acknowledge how we feel, but the issue comes with what happens (or what doesn’t happen) next.

Some of us go into blame and stay there.  A few of us will even see the other person as a villain. Again, there is nothing inherently wrong with this.  It’s a part of the healing process.

(If you would like some support in feeling at peace, watch my first video on Forgiveness here==> https://youtu.be/dYElv3hoBv0)

The issue comes when you fail to see your power.  

Then, there is another scenario. This is the one where we do not want to let go, because we are too afraid of what life would look like without a relationship with that person.  Even if we did not like the relationship and verbalized that we wanted something different, we are not quite ready go into the unknown.  Instead, we hold on.

Each of these responses to change separates you from your power. A huge part of healing is reclaiming your power. 

Here is where the wisdom of your inner Love Renegade comes in…

…What if the circumstance or breakup was ultimately in your highest good?
…What if the presence of the other person, villain or not, gave you the opportunity to set a boundary or uphold a new standard for yourself?
…What if the Universe is guiding you toward having the relationship and circumstances that your heart yearns for?

There is a reason why I chose relationships as my area of specialization. For years I was a magnet for people who wanted me to be someone I was not and who would get really angry and project their own wounding onto me.  For so long I felt that something was wrong with me.  I held onto these relationships. I worked on myself and turned myself inside out.  Then, one day I saw the Truth and set myself free.

In my empowered path of healing, I have chosen to align with my divinity, my soul-level gifts of Divine Wisdom and Divine Love.  I have chosen to live my design and free myself from illusion. From this, I have healed my body, enjoy a passionate and healthy relationship with my husband, and nurture loving and supportive relationships.

I also share my love by coaching amazing people in living their Divinity and freeing themselves from the Illusions of Relationship™.  It’s been a huge journey. I treasure the sacred work I get to do with my clients, whether it is for one conversation or years of sessions. I am deeply grateful.

Over the years I have found that every relationship shows us how important it is to love yourself and know your power. When you accept this as truth, you magnetize every person and experience to you that empowers you to be your highest potential.

Every relationship, regardless of how long it lasts or how it ends, comes with a gift. Will you receive this gift?

Thank you for reading.  Sending you blessings of healing, empowerment, and love.

Love Renegade Wisdom & Healing Blessings,

Lauren

P.S.  In addition to the Forgiveness video above, here is another healing resource, called “Your Solution for Feeling Hurt & Let Down,”  to help you feel better as you heal from a breakup or embrace the potentially amazing changes that are unfolding in your life: https://youtu.be/ogPFf3UbV6A

Do you forgive easily?

Do you forgive easily?

When it comes to relationships, the subject of forgiveness becomes inevitable. If you are anything like my clients and me, you have mixed feelings or strong emotions around forgiveness. If someone still has your power, as in they are living in your head rent-free, then it might be time to forgive—or at the very least explore the subject of forgiveness.  To support you with this, I created a Love Renegades Forgiveness Series.  Watch part one called “The Annoying Thing about Forgiveness” here and feel empowered about your next healing steps:

Watch here on my YouTube Channel 👉  https://youtu.be/dYElv3hoBv0

Of course, you can read the description below but the video is more fun and it contains a special healing transmission for you. 👇

Hi Beautiful. Today let’s talk about why it is so hard to forgive. Wow. You know forgiveness really used to be a concept that annoyed me.  I thought “why in the world would I forgive someone who has hurt me and caused me problems?  Why even waste time thinking of the other person? Why give them my energy?” Why, why, why??

Then one day, I realized that as much as I did not want to forgive them or think about them, they were still creepin’ their way into my heart and experience. When I realized that my thoughts and in a word way that these people had some power over me, that was when I was like , “no, no, no. It is time to gt in touch with my inner Love Renegade and let this go.”

So right now you might be upset with somebody and harbor lots of feelings of hurt. You may have been betrayed. Someone may have treated you in a mean or maybe even abusive way. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that you need to be in a relationship with that person or that there needs to be a happy resolution.

No it means it is about freeing yourself so that you can allow more Love to come to you. So that you can feel better within yourself, your experience, and within your relationships. This really supports you in attracting and manifesting circumstances and relationship that reflect what you ultimately consciously desire, which is love and to be loved

Thank you for spending time with me.  

Energy Replenishing for Empaths

Being an empath is beautiful.  Being able to connect so deeply with another and be able to feel their emotions is a beautiful gift. The problem is when we are experiencing the less desirable aspects of being so sensitive such as feeling depleting or not realizing that the pain you are feeling is not even your own. In this video,  you will gain insight into how you can replenish your energy.

Watch here: https://youtu.be/Z9sxHiv4pWA

In this video, I shed light on the Illusion of Sacrifice, one of the six Illusions of Relationship™.

Feels, Emotions, Relationships and DRAMA

The Law of Drama is the Law of Relationship™ that separates us from love with dramatic experiences, over-reactions, resentments, and mistaking our [very loud] feelings for our intuition.

To break the Law of Drama we must accept that when we take steps toward transforming our circumstances—either in attracting our ideal partner, healing our broken hearts, enhancing our current relationship, or in up-leveling other parts of our lives—we are making a conscious choice to instigate change our lives.

When we choose to change, Drama knocks on our door ready to support us with the transformation we desire.

Most of us, when we experience drama, get lost in negative loops of thought and emotion. This may cause us to abandon our plans for transformation and to sabotage our progress. We may tell ourselves that we are not on the right path. We may doubt everything that we used to feel so strongly about before. Those of us who choose to break the law of drama, transcend the drama by rising above it.

See how this plays out in this “Law of Drama Case Study” with Lauren Wenzell. Lauren is a courageous, sensitive soul who writes beautiful poetry (you can check out her work on Instagram at @laurenspeacefulpoetry) and who works with children with autism. This time last year Lauren came face-to-face with the Law of Drama when her father died and just a mere few days later her longterm boyfriend broke up with her!

Watch to find out how she found her power in one of the hardest (and certainly most dramatic) times of her life here=====> https://youtu.be/bGfGcN1SSIE


Quiz-What's your Illusion of Relationship™?
 

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